Panicky about our Preoccupation
– Stage 5 -

Preoccupation with a deceased loved one is very normal for the bereaved. That person was very much a part of our daily lives.

preoccupied and lonely

It would be unusual if you didn’t think of your loved one as you sat down to dinner without them or climbed into an empty bed. Expect that you will have difficulty concentrating and that you feel in a fog.

I actually went through this stage of grief before my husband died. Because of his mental illness, he became a homeless drifter. My young daughter and I experienced the loss of his presence before we lost him to death. Therefore we processed through this grief stage before he actually died.

I like what Granger Westberg said in his chapter on this subject in his helpful little book,

Good Grief

“We must not however wallow in our gloom, for it will only prolong our grief work. And to work through grief is very hard work.”

We must not minimize the fact that this is tough stuff.

Go to Stage 6 - Guilt

Return from Preoccupation to Stages of Bereavement

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