There is a time when grief counseling might be necessary.
Most experts agree that the best healer for grief is time. We need not interfere with this process. Many times they feel premature help actually hinders instead of helping the bereaved.
There may be times when we need to talk to someone who is not so close to the situation. That’s what a counselor is for. If the bereavement is complicated; suicide, you were estranged at time of death, you are having trouble moving through grief process and any other number of reasons, you may not be able to do this alone.
There are some indicators that could point to more problematic grief. Remember you may experience these with regular, normal grieving. It is when they continue for long periods with great intensity that they could indicate a problem that requires grief counseling.
Certainly if you have a pastor - talk with them and talk with your medical doctor. Sometimes they may not have the qualifications to help you, but you can resource them to help you find a competent counselor or therapist. This is so important. You want to find one that is the right fit. One that you can trust to help guide you through in a healthy way.
Here is a list of some indicators that might call for a counselor..
- Depression and/or extreme agitation
- Poor decision-making
- Intense anger – focused on certain people
- A continued disinterest in work, activities and social contact
- Yearnings for the deceased on a continued daily basis over a long period of time. Upsetting memories that keep recurring.
- Having trouble admitting your loved one is dead
- Extreme long term efforts to avoid reminders of the deceased (I had a twenty-four year old cousin, a beautiful and talented young woman, commit suicide. For years my aunt put away all reminders of her and would not even mention her name.)
- Won’t slow down long enough to allow themselves to go through the grief process
- Our mind is such a strong influence over our bodies. We can feel ill without really being so. (Psychosomatic Symptoms)
- On the other end of that spectrum, if we don’t reduce our stress level and we go for too long running on adrenaline, we will actually break our bodies down and become sick.
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