On this page I offer “ Funeral Directors Suggestions “.
I have a good friend, who with his son runs a funeral home. Not too long ago I asked them if they had anything they wanted to mention in regards to funerals and the time surrounding them.
Following are some of their thoughts. They are things I had not thought of. Good practical suggestions that people not in the funeral profession might not think of.
1 - If the death occurs in a different state than the funeral and burial will be in -- let the funeral home that is going to handle the service arrange for delivery of body. They are able to get the best prices for transport. They also have the ability to connect with the proper people to make sure everything goes smoothly.
2 - Talk to / communicate with the funeral director about the services you want. Let them coordinate all aspects, talking to the pastor, music people, and others. That way all the people involved can be on the same page. Everything can be well organized. One person in charge makes for smoother operation. When more than one person is “in charge” there is room for errors to occur.
3 - When possible, the bereaved family should carpool to the visitation and funeral. This will help provide more parking for all of the people who want to stop in and pay their respects.
4 - Stop in to wake no matter how you are dressed. The family would rather see you in your work clothes than not see you at all! You stopping by to see them is what means something to family - not what you are wearing!
This one is my own observation
5 - Lately there has been a tendency for people to bring in food and drinks to the funeral home. I believe people think they are being helpful, but most times the family doesn’t have time to eat. What ends up happening is that children will wander away from their parents and make a mess. It can be hard enough to keep an eye on the kids at a funeral without giving them the temptation of goodies. If you feel there will be a real need for food to keep up energy levels, consider bringing nuts, M&M's or a trail mix. People can eat as much or as little as they want and there won't be the worry of dropping something sticky on the floor.
If you want to provide the grieving family with food, find out who the” food coordinator “ is and set up a time to bring a full meal to the families home. (See my page on making a food basket.)
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